When The Past Hurts

A few days ago, I had an injury to an emotional scab.

Oh, I would have thought it was just an old scar by now, but it wasn’t. This surprised me, and I kind of found myself reeling. Spiritually and emotionally unable to handle the intense pain and shock from something I thought I was well enough to handle. So, instead of pressing on with unwavering faith and trust, I was crippled by the weight of distrust and a lot of ugly feelings that I didn’t want to face.

I HURT. Hurt was all I felt. Not joy, love or hope. Just heart-wrenching hurt.

I spent a couple days walking numb through a disheveled mental state. That whole “files under the ceiling fan” feeling I’ve mentioned before.

And then enters discouragement with a thought battle that sounds like…“How do I get back to where I was… we were?”

“Well, I blew it this time! Way to react!!! I’ve let my spouse down, and my Savior down. I am a failure.”

“How do I talk to him, or them, or deal with life today? I just want to sit still somewhere and zone out.”

Oh, here’s a rough one…

“I shouldn’t have to deal with this! It isn’t fair.”

Right now, you may be, hurting… AGAIN. Thinking you are so tired of this cycle of pain. Let me share with you some truth to fight the pain and discouragement and help you to heal God’s way.

1. God knows EXACTLY how you feel and He is NOT disappointed that you are hurting. He wants to help you with that pain, and hold you through the hard times. God is for you. With this setback, there can be beautiful growth so lean close to Him. “The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit: A broken and a contrite heart, O God, thou wilt not despise.” Psalm‬ ‭51‬:‭17‬ ‭KJV “Make me to hear joy and gladness; That the bones which thou hast broken may rejoice.” Psalm‬ ‭51‬:‭8‬

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2. “If you can’t say something nice…” you know the rest of this adage. Hurting people tend to lash out and say hurtful things. This is not the time to engage in a deep conversation, and that’s ok. Grieve, pray, fill your mind with God’s Word and God-honoring uplifting music… and let the Lord work on your hurting heart. I tend to get a little numb during these times, which is a mixed blessing. But if you’re prone to “mouthing off” or “striking while iron is hot,” try stepping back in a painful moment to keep from making a bigger mess. Just season those words with kindness as much as possible while you deal with that “scab”. This is not the time to spew your hurt onto your loved ones. Time, perspective and the Holy Spirit will soothe that hurt. “Wherefore, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath: for the wrath of man worketh not the righteousness of God.” James‬ ‭1‬:‭19‬-‭20‬ ‭KJV‬

3. Look to a future where that painful scab is just a scar. May that scar be a reminder of the strength and healing you gained from a painful wound from long ago. Just as the scars in the hands, feet and side of our Savior remind you of God’s grace toward you, let this scar remind you of God’s grace in you. “He healeth the broken in heart, And bindeth up their wounds.” Psalm‬ ‭147‬:‭3‬ ‭KJV‬‬.